April 24, 2024

Kozmik Korner by Lush Gumball

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Q: I recently read about a Catholic priest that was legally dead for a quarter of an hour before medic shocked his heart and brought him back. The priest claimed when he awoke that he had died, gone to heaven and met God. The 71-year-old want to continue preaching and tell the story of how God was a bright, loving light, buy clearly feminine. The Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Boston hasn’t confirmed that he can return to his flock. Should he be allowed to return to the alter with his story?
A: In the history of mankind told everywhere, women have always played second fiddle. My guess is they’ll say he met Mary in cooking heaven.

Q: In an article about a website “Something Awful” I learned that it is the birthplace of “Slenderman.” While the stories are folklore, paranormal anecdotes, young people around the world are imagining the scary character as real. In the U.S. a couple of preteen girls stabbed their best friend nearly 20 times in the name and fear of Slendereman. What is the fascination with evil characters these days? Why do kids believe in them?
A: There is – Dracula, Jason, Frankenstein, Mummy, Werewolves, Freddy Krueger, Michael Meyers, even Chucky. What’s not to believe?

Q: I was told a story about a Russian scientist from the Russian Academy of Sciences is calling for an “urgent” investigation into the cause of dozens of new “pingos” or giant mystery craters he has discovered in the Siberian Arctic. According to a knowledgeable blogger, they actually occur only when under-soil ice melts and releases gas. Some of these craters are under areas where people live and work. Any thoughts?
A: I always have thoughts/ I just don’t have any regarding the farting earth in the frozen tundra of Russia. It would explain the desire for vodka.

Q: A friend of mine told me that there are other Bermuda Triangles (Devil’s Triangle)on earth besides the one that connect Bermuda to Florida to Puerto Rico. Some alien or Atlantis theorists even said that the Bermuda Triangle has flipped over from the Atlantic Ocean to an area in the South China Sea near South-East Asia, causing the disappearance of recent airliners. Others believe that there are spots like the Bermuda Triangle all over the world and we are just now discovering them with the expansion of air travel. Do you believe there are Bermuda Triangles around the world?
A: I believe in as much as possible – just in case.

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