You’re an Old Sedonan…
- When you buy a computer to send email to save on postage.
- When you count your Bingo losses as church offerings.
- When you are told your memory bank has been burglarized.
- When asked about liquid assets, you search the stock in the liquor cabinet.
- When a prune juice wine cooler is your favorite beverage.
- When your skull x-rays are mistaken for those of an extinct not-so-great ape.
- When you check into a motel and suffer motion sickness while reading the Bible on the Magic Fingers vibrating bed.
- When you go to an All-U-Can-Eat buffet and the hot food is cold when you get back to your table.
- When everything on the “History Channel” seems like reruns.
- When you get lost in a thought and realize it’s totally unfamiliar territory.
- When you discover you are diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
- When you are more worried about your number of bowel movements than your mounting number of driving accidents.
- When your mind becomes like a steel trap – quite rusty and illegal in 37 states.
- When bacteria is the only culture you have left.
