October 22, 2018

Horoscopes for December 9-15, 2012

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ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

This month, melodramatic complications can come from people close to you. It would be best to keep your distance, or wear one of those surgical mask thingies.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)

You may feel as though it is impossible to combine your desires with what is good for you. You know – if it’s fattening, looks good or feels good, you can’t have it.

GEMINI (May 21 -June 20)

You decked your halls, sang carols door-to-door, gave away cookies to friends and co-workers. All that’s left is to smile when you unwrap the underwear and socks.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22)

December promises to be an emotional roller coaster. Ups, downs, sharp turns and screaming, all a part of your love life. Remember to keep your hands in the cart.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

Uranus retrogrades to call for a different approach to personal goals, and less focus on material success. If you want to feel satisfied, try to unretrograde Uranus.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

People may say you miss out on life because you observe it rather than experience it directly. A good coach may work from the sidelines, but they’re not in the game.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)

This month, you will be tempted by those who are mature and experienced. That’s just astro-babble for: some really old person will probably try to hit on you.

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

You will focus on doing a good job and furthering your ambitions at work. As usual, no one who matters will notice and you can kiss that bonus goodbye.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)

This December, you may have to reveal more of yourself than you normally do in order to sway people to your side. Just be very careful to keep it rated PG-13.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)

Neither you nor anyone around you is particularly tactful, so this is the perfect chance to clear the air. Remember, a lighted match could cause a minor explosion.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)

You usually tolerate the quirks and minor shortcomings of your friends or family members, but this month you’ll finally be moved to tell them where to get off.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20)

This month, you will put a lot of energy into upgrading your skills and increasing your knowledge. Now, if you can find an opening as a Guitar Hero expert.

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